Friendships and Life Circumstances

legaljen1969

A lot of us have gotten to know each other pretty well and we do share about other experiences other than our cancer treatment. I think our "whole" lives often affect our cancer treatments and healing and recovery.
I recently saw a comment from someone who said this is "STRICTLY" for posting experiences and advice regarding cancer and cancer treatment and not to post unrelated content. Well, I know the thread she commented on was a little extreme, but how far do we take this? Are we not allowed to comment on or discuss anything that is not cancer related? I mean, if that's the case- we have been operating out of bounds for quite a while now.

MarcieB

Thank you for voicing this.

I saw the same post and have the same reaction. My feeling is; if you are not interested in the link someone has posted, simply don't activate it. No one is forcing anyone to read (or listen to) anything. Like you said, if we cannot not comment on anything that is not cancer related, we have been operating out of bounds for quite a while now! And frankly, that is one of the things that has made our site so valuable to us. It is the very reason we are fighting to keep it going.

We are human, and I daresay, most of us are female - you know how the female brain is wired...we go down rabbit holes! Regularly! What about our recent posts about what books we are reading? I doubt a review of Where the Crawdads Sing is going to cure anyone's cancer, but taking about books lifts a lot of our spirits and you can't convince me that doesn't help.

We are wonderfully diverse. And I think we have all had experiences that prove our body/mind/soul, are connected. We are more than our bodies, our tumors, our diagnosis. It is obvious that some of us consider faith to be a valuable help in our journey. Others, not so much, but why isn't that okay? Some of our fears and concerns may seem irrational to others, so why don't those *others* just let it alone?

One thing for sure - this is NOT a site to be critical of others. I say, if you don't like someone's post, click out and go to FaceBook or something. If anyone wants a more medical based forum, I'm sure there are plenty of those available. and BTW, there is no reason we can't access more than one site when looking for medical advice.

beachbum5817

I agree that we are free to ask anything that we want. We are hear to help each other. If I don't have anything worthwhile to add to a question or post, I just scroll on down. We also can do whatever we want since we are not getting any guidance from the moderator. Just my opinion.

Bug

Greg periodically posted things that were not cancer related. I think we would have his blessing.

Dltmoll

I agree with all of you. We are a community; members of a community should be able to freely share. I so appreciate all of you and love insights into you all as people, not just cancer patients/survivors.

TerriL

I agree with all of you also. We have lives outside of our cancer experiences. All of us saw Greg's woodworking posts, and things of the sort.

Myungclas

It was the kindest way I could think of to say “no one comes here to read your crazy end of days conspiracy s&$t!” I’ve been part of this group for many years and have found comfort, comradery, humor…lots of great conversations about many things. But a radical evangelical screaming about end times…on Rumble, no less…no one comes here for that. She posted it over and over with more and more capital letters. Not at all sure how to leave this group, but if someone wants to remove me, feel free. I have neither time or patience for a platform that supports crazy.

MarcieB

It is interesting to me that only 7 days ago you responded to a question titled "What We Say," like this:

Now you have me thinking about my own responses. I usually try to be compassionate, loving and helpful, if I can. There was a post at one point about the Taxol lawsuit, tho…I’ll have to go back and see how I worded my response to the inquiry about that. I can’t imagine participating in something that would make a lifesaving drug more expensive or harder to get. Hope I was kind (insert blushing emoji).

This site is not about crazy. But, it is about compassion. There is no reason in the world for you to waste your time reading a post you do not feel appropriate. And you don't have to. I hope you won't go, there is much here that can be so valuable, and one of those things is loving tolerance. If there were several posts of this ilk, by more than one person, I would agree we should consider boundaries. But, this person has been here a long time too, and has as much right as any of us to say what is on her heart. JMO

legaljen1969

I was trying to be nice, supportive, compassionate- whatever else can be said. Listen, Myungclas- quite frankly you have really shown me the side of this site I like the very least. If that was the nicest way you could express it, I would hate to see your meanest way.
I really do want to enjoy this site, but people like you make it extremely hard to do so.
I didn't look at the videos because I figured they would be off the wall. If you took time to visit the videos, that's on you. You CHOSE to view it. Sorry you didn't like it.
My nice button is about to be worn out and it's best I get the heck outta dodge before my mean button is activated- because there will be no return if I hit that one.

Carool

I hadn’t seen this until now (I guess that in order to find out what people are posting, we now have to go to each person’s walls, since we no longer get notices from the site). I did read the initial comment and response.

I can’t deal with fanatics or conspiracy theorists. So I don’t listen to or follow their posts, including those on WN. However, we have very few such fanatics, so they’re easy to avoid. I agree with what others here said.

I also think it’s unfair and an unrealistic assessment of WN to imply that “crazies” are “supported” by WN. This site has many very helpful people who are generous with their knowledge and kindness. And we are kind to each other.

cak61

Since this site is primarily dealing with cancer, I do feel concern when I see things that sound like misinformation. I hope people do some fact checking and speak with their doctor before following ANY advice on here.
If this site were to become something no longer useful, I will move along without it, as I have done with Facebook, because it was leaving me with negative feelings.
There is no need for name calling if you disagree. Especially on this site. We should be supporting each other.
Just scroll on, or post an informative reply, nicely!

legaljen1969

I cannot imagine anyone would take the advice of people on this site over that of their doctor. Well, maybe someone would. I don't know. I do think I have gotten questions I can ask my doctor after seeing things on here. I read what a lot of you said in the early days of the vaccines and compiled some questions for my oncologist and my surgeon. I read information from others who have had breast cancer and mastectomies and asked my doctor about various things I had read.
I understand that the post Myungclas objected to was pretty far out in left field- and it really didn't have to do with cancer. But calling the poster crazy and being rude was out of line.

petieagnor

I don't remember reading anything like what Jen referred, but I will say that I read everything & take some things with a grain of salt. I feel that there are more important things going on for me to give a second thought to something that doesn't smack me in the face with importance. I realize how you all feel, and you've voiced your opinions. It didn't get deleted by whomever so we are all good.
I still haven't learned how to post a question after several years of being on this site, but I love you all.

Bengal

A cancer diagnosis affects EVERY aspect of our lives. I'm sure that's not news to anyone who has had the misfortune. Discussion of theses things beyond just treatments and medication should be perfectly acceptable. As someone pointed out, if you find something posted here that isn't your "cup of tea" just skip over it. I know there have been things posted in the past that absolutely made me cringe. You don't need to engage in dialog. Just scroll past.