lilymadeline

Hi;

Just a quick happy new year along with a request that you look up "aflatoxins", if you would. Here is a good place to start: http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/002429.htm

LillyMadeline I thought you might enjoy this video as you are a dancer.
http://www.littlethings.com/breast-cancer-patient-dances-operating-room/
Happy New Year

How long have you been on Arimidex and how long did it take to have side effects?

Hi Lilymadeline. I want to come to LA soon to see you. I still would like to join your support group. I need to be around other survivors of this chronic disease. I am so sorry to hear about your spine and kidneys. All this chemo just seem to ravish our bodies in such an awful way. I pray your pain subsides and they get you back on the trials. You are such an inspiration to us all.

My vacation was awesome and I enjoyed my children a lot. My daughter says I am putting too much pressure on her to get married and to give me grand kids. I was in LA on Monday to get a colonoscopy and still suffering from the pain. I am sitting around waiting for my system to start back working and get me out of this pain.

I hope to see you by the new year. Let me know. aw silverstar with the tag line yahoo with a dot and a com.

Take care,
Angela

Money doesn't buy happiness, but it sure makes the misery easier.

I was taking a free restaurant management at the community college after I got out of the shelter. We got Pell Grants for that.

One of my classmates was living in her car with her 6 year old. 2 were couch surfing, several had their kids in a one room run down motel. 2 were hoofing it from a woman's shelter. Ww didn't let it hang out, we were trying to hide this from others. There was lots of sympathy for me, because I was in my late 50s, my husband put me in physical therapy, and one of the young women had been in the shelter with me.

Okay a classmate in her late 30s came in screaming and crying. The Instructor, the men and us all came to find out what was wrong. Her husband served her with divorce papers, and she didn't know what to do, she didn't know where she would live.

The class that was to help her. The instructor asked her-Just what is your #1 problem. Last week she forwarded a $25,000 deposit for their annual European cruise down the Danube, a week in Paris. OK the instructor looks like he was kicked in the stomach. What's your next problem? The mountain chalet needed a new roof, and the renters in the condo finally were evicted, but they left it filled with ticks. She didn't know what to do with the 2 local restaurants (nice ones). The instructor called up a friend in county records and he comes back and whispers to us that all of this was true.

He started the class, at that point. She left wailing that she didn't now what to do with the Sa Francisco restaurant that her father left her. She'd try to go to Portland and live with her childhood girl friend. Then she was wailing about the european trip.

All of the kids, asked what was wrong with her. She didn't have to be in a shelter, standing in food lines with kids, etc. I asked them if she would hurt, if her husband died. They said, "Of Course." I told them that money doesn't stop the hurt, but it sure as H makes it a lot easier to recover. They asked me if I felt sorry for her. I told them that I wasn't sorry for her at all. She was spoiled and didn't know anything about life.

I guess other people told her what they thought or tried to borrow money from her. She attended one more class- dropped out. Our prof is from a well-to-do company family. He said-Yesterday, you see what the working person has to put up with. If you ever work for her, she won't remember that you were kind to her.

I know that when my X died, I felt terrible about his suffering and death. I talked about the good times we had. I say that he drove off with a blonde. I really went to the shelter for abused women, and he moved in with the blonde. My children talked him into signing divorce papers, and they helped me to get a little apartment that was safe. I just don't care to spend my life being eaten up by bitterness. This is why there are contradictions in what I write

Relaxing and watching horse racing and baking cookies.

The pictures are from google/images.....just go there and type in ANY word and hundreds of Pictures pop up.....it's amazing.
Have a good time at the Party....B

Hey Lily,
Just wanted to share a cool new song ( Lyrics by John Vaughan from The UK....and a few from me) called "STAR SPANGLED NIGHT IN DIXIE"...Hope all is going ok today.....I'm a little lost today but feel Good. Barry

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=faWZgi-ZvAQ&list=UUoT7YwZk4FLagioii_zuLCw

Lilymadeline, how are you doing with the crazy weather in your area? I hope it didn't affect you or yours.

lilymadeline, Thank you for your post. Everything you said showed you knew exactly where I am. You've survived 3 primary cancers.. you are a super hero! You are so right about God (yes I believe in God and our God is a mighty God) knowing all the answers. I have my granddaughters and my only child to continue fighting for, but first for myself I think.. because you truly can't live "for" someone else.
I see your little dogs in your picture there. Those are your babies and your family. My best friend never had children. We've known each other for 48 years now. She rescues wildlife.. deer, raccoons, etc. and they are her children. Love is love, no matter where you send it or give it to.
I wish you the very, very best, and appreciate so much what you said.
One more thing.. do you follow azsuper? (Fred) I am worried about him.
Hugs!! Junebug0121/Brenda

You were right. I pushed the Dr. Your eorrds are all true.

I really appreciate your post. I love your hopefulness. Unfortunately, my mom's liver is failing now. Although we have been told already that "there is nothing else they can do for her" now there is really nothing that can be done to reverse this. I'm trying to figure out a way to talk to her about why we are not going to Michigan in 3 days without hurting her or making her feel like we are giving up. Hospice is extremely helpful right now and I spoke with her case manager and nurse and she informed me that this is the end and it will very likely happen quickly. She saw how fast she declined in the past few days and said she has seen this and it goes downhill really fast. I'm scared. I'm angry. But most of all, I'm so heartbroken to tell her that treatment is not an option. I'm always the one to tell her "no, there's always hope, always something left to try!" and now i have to break it to her that this is the end and we are going to make her comfortable in her last days.

hello, I so identified with your issue of finances tonight did the same thing today. I'm sorry if I already asked you this but which was your primary cancer? See you have 4? And I had a friend as well that was very dear to me that decided this was too much for them and still breaks my heart. Sorry to see similar situation for you when you need that person so much. Nice we have this site to commiserate with one another.

Thank you so much for your great replies. I'm a little confused by this part of your answer: "one time they pulled me off of those treatments was actually for the pelvic uterine cancers, where I already had dozens of treatments in that area ( for bones ) so the stopped after 5 treatments ( I have looked it up now ) because they were concerned about overdoing it in one area. But I am scared about that, I wanted more radiation to hit the uterine cells that may have been hiding out. Although I felt fine, the radiation was actually possibly doing some real damage to my body so they stopped. What did I know!" Can you explain further if you don't mind? Thanks. If I don't do external I was going to try brachy still and drs said Monday longest can wait. Again thank you for caring.

I admire your courage and look always for your postings. Sometimes I wish and pray that certain people live for ever and you are one of those. hugs.

Very interested in the conference information. I am going through this 2nd time, 10 years later. Came back in scar and in my internal mammory nodes. Went through 36 rads and was on tamoxifen again but due to side effects switched to aromisen. Had an allergic reaction. I've tried Femara and arimodex after my 5 years of tamoxifen first time, severe se also. I heard there's an injection AI they are using, but waiting for oncologist to come up with plan.
Unfortunately rads did not change anything with tumor in nodes.so waiting to see if I can be transferred to ucla. Was told metastatic cancer is something I have to live with and do best to contain to nodes. That's reason for me reaching out to site to connect with others and get wisdom (and my mind around it) thru you all.

I was only half kidding BUT ya never know.
I just posted a Song Honoring you Gals who have BC...Check it out. Hope you're feeling good today....

Hey Lily,
Sounds like you are Broke like me and my wife. SHE still has some money in the Market but it's going to her son and doesn't want to touch much of it. We live on our SS checks and a little from her stocks. IF you can ever figure out HOW to market ME, My Songs or any crazy idea that I have GO FOR IT. Maybe we can both make a few bucks. I'll give you a cut in anything you ever do.....and I'm honest and desperate.....lol........

https://www.facebook.com/pages/SingerSongwriter-My-Journey-From-There-to-Here/368690619962745

Barry b d b u t l e r @ c e n t u r y l i n k . n e t

Hi did u have radiation for the uterine cancer? Long term affects?

Thank you for your continued encouragement. I'm in a slump i can't climb out of today. Mostly related to work calling telling me mine time is up after 8 years working there. Two horrible experiences at doctors two days in a row. Isolation from people thought were friends, don't get me wrong glad for what I do have just weary it seems. And not like normal faith full self. You stay optimistic it appears no matter what, admirable and thank you for sharing.

Hello do I understand correctly you received pelvic radiation too? And no problems with it in regard to burning skin or bowel issues? Thank you for any info.

Hi Lilymadeline's. Thinking about you and wishing u well. I have had my 12th round and now for the scans to check. I am sure i am clear. I just have to battle with the neuropathy which is so painful 24 hours a day. Yuck! I never go a chance to come to LA because of the pain and all the side effects. I hope to get there someday in the future. Take care and God bless

Hi lilymadeline. Any suggestions on what I should ask the oncologist? I get to finally see him tomorrow and get my CT and Deca Scan results. Thank you so much! xoxo Tina

I'm honored Miss Lily.

Hi lilymadeline. I am seeing the oncologist Tuesday. Besides my ct, Dexa scan and blood work results what do I need to ask him? You had told me a couple weeks back about asking him if the tamoxifen is working correctly. I have that as something I will ask him about. I have to think it is working because I feel misable bones hurt so bad and my hot flashes are really out of control. Do I ask him about my hormone levels? I had lumpectomy chemo radiation and I'm taking the tamoxfin been on it almost 1 year now and I feel worse everyday. I have had so many problems since. Dr took my ovaries & tubes out, then I ended up in the hospital with pancreatitis then the dr took my gallbladder out and now I have been fighting c-difficle. I still have bad neuropathy in my hands and feet too. I also now have to go in and have a colonoscopy this Friday too. I have been on so many many meds and seen so many many Drs I just don't know how to deal with this all anymore. I think if I have some questions for the oncologist and can get some answers maybe it will help me. I have to tell him how bad my knees feel they ache hurt all the time and the more I excercise the more they seem to be hurting. I can barley stand up after I sit down. The pain is so bad. I feel like I am 80 not 40. I just want help and answers so bad

Thank god for our babies! They sure comfort us, don't they. Lola and I send our love!

Respond when you can...a DATE? that's sound GREAT...a Great Date....Have a good day Lilly.....B

I love dogs too! I like your photo with your babies. I have a 2 yr old Caviler King Charles (she is my photo) and she is my baby. Got her two months before I found out I had cancer. She has been by my side the entire way. I couldn't imagine my life without her. She has kept me going

Hey Lilly.....I also had and played Cherry Red 12 String Rickenbacker like the one Roger McGuinn and John Lennon Played. My first band required a bass player. I heard these guys talking about this at the Student Union at the U of Miami in 1965 and didn't even know WHAT a bass guitar was. I walked over and introduced myself to them and asked for a tryout. I immediately went to the local Music Store and bought a Hofner Bass like the one McCartney played....looked like a violin. Spent two days with it, auditioned for the band ( called THE DEAD actually ) and played with them for 3 years. That was the band that I opened for The Beach Boys with and also the Love & Spoonful....We did songs like GLORIA by THEM and Songs from the Kinks, Stones, Moody Blues and all of those great songs. I played mostly bass but also keys and guitar....we did some of my originals also. Great Times and I learned SO MUCH...I wrote a song called SINATRA & THE MOODY BLUES.... . BTW I have this great Christmas Song and Video called CHRISTMAS IN NEW YORK.....it's at my barrydbutler channel on youtube. What exactly did you do in the real world.....DANCE PRO? Tell me a little about YOU.....sounds Interesting.......I'm still writing and recording all the time and havge this great alter ego band called BARRY & THE BOOMERS.....It all starts out in 1966 when I signed a recording contract. On my way home that day I had a car crash and was in a coma for 35 years. On awakening I started the BAND...the song WOKE UP AFTER 35 YEARS...is incredible....check it out. I have a made up Review of the First GIG they ever had and that was at Madison Square Garden and even now I read it and laugh and cry.....I also wrote the music only to a Musical Called DOG SHOW THE MUSICAL....16 songs and Lyrics and Book by Phyllis Barash.....a cancer survivor and almost 82...NEVER Produced except a few times HERE as a children's Production....It's an AMAZING TAIL of a Mutt from The Bronx who somehow cons his way into an International Dog Show at Madison Square Garden and wins Best in Show.....It's incredible BUT NEVER could find anybody to help us. It could be the Next Great American Musical except NOBODY knows anything about it except me and Phyllis. I've had the opening number WE HAVE A SHOW TONIGHT....in the top 20 in Musicals On sound click for 3 straight years almost everyday.....It went to #2 once.....lol ANYWAY that's my story and I'm sticking to it.....lol Hope you feel OK TODAY...

"CHURCH ON A HILL"

http://www.soundclick.com/player/single_player.cfm?songid=12957125&q=hi